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I already know what you’re thinking.  (Or, at least, the self conscious version of my alter ego thinks I know…)

You’re thinking, “Why is this lady posting six-month-old dance videos?  Doesn’t she realize that she’s in a new state with a daughter who is totally happy at a new studio?”

I know, I know.  

I know!!  

You’re right.  Sorta.  But, here’s the thing about distance.  As far away as you may be, it’s always right there.

The distance somehow always feels so close.  That dance recital I’m crying over?  It feels like yesterday.  

That long-legged girl on the stage?  She was in a car seat just last week.  Those tears I’m crying?  They have been saved up for longer than the distance knows.

Distance is a strange thing.

It’s an odd feeling how you can feel an entire world apart and then one single video can transport you through time and place your heart right where you thought you had left.

I’m not mourning the past or regretting the move, but I am sad.  I’m sad that the videos I’ve just watched are the last of their kind.

Yes, there will be more dance videos.  Soooo many more dance videos.  There will be competition videos and living room videos and dancing in the grocery store videos.  (Yes.  The grocery store.  I don’t make this stuff up.)

But do you know what there won’t ever be again?  

There won’t be “dance with your little girl dance idol” videos.  There won’t be “dance with the girls you grew up with” videos.  There won’t be “late night, five hour, night before competition with your best friends” videos.  There won’t be “dance sleepover at the studio” videos. 

There won’t be a Mindy or a Paityn or an Alicia or an Olivia in those videos.  There won’t be a mom dance or a dad dance.  

There won’t be roots.  And those roots ran really deep.

But here’s the thing about distance.  It might be hard and sad.  It might mean a lot of “there won’t ever be agains” and a few tears shed.  

But distance also means that we have many homes.  Home is here, but home is also anywhere we’ve been loved.  We may have left, but that doesn’t mean we are far away.  

This dancer girl has cheerleaders from coast to coast.  Trust me, that McKenna has a scream that we will be able to hear from a stage in Florida.  

We love it here in our new home.  The kids are happy, life is good, and the dancer girl adores her new dance studio.  There will be videos.  There will be memories and new heart strings that attach to the walls of these new ballet barres.  

I’ll show you raw dancer pictures and elated competition photos and die-hard dancer practice videos.  I’ll show you new dance friends and new dance idols and opportunities that knock on this girl’s door which we could have never imagined.

We will grow new memories here and we will eventually pull those heartstrings when the dancer girl grows up and moves on.

Distance is inevitable.  Moving on is necessary.  But roots?  Those run deep.  Ours stretch from coast to coast.  

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Be grateful (for roots), water your own grass,

…and drink coffee.

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2 Comments

  1. Now I’m crying. Tears of happiness, understanding, but mostly tears of gratitude. I love this post Angie. Almost as much as I love you, Emily, and your whole family.

    1. Ok, now I’m crying…again! I don’t have words. Your roots definitely run deep in our family. Im already missing the “Angie doing McKenna’s lips” pic, and the “M&eM” pics,…. Just the overall “Then/Now through the years”, pics that we have done, and now arent happening. However, I also know this now means McKenna has a bestie across the country! And I love hearing them talk on Facetime, and get excited to send letters or “goodies” that just the two of them understand LOL. I am beyond grateful for your family, your love, your support, and your deep roots in our heart.

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